Friday, May 25, 2007

Filipino Time

i hate long lines... two of them are: the long yellow-brown skid marks on my tighty whities (see: underwear stains), and enrollment.

there we are, waiting and standing in front of the office. waiting for the goddamned door to open at exactly one o'clock pm (as we were told. and as scheduled.) the clock ticked 1pm... we peered through the glass window to see if there are any people inside. to nobody's surprise, nobody was inside. a security guard walked towards us at around 1:10pm and he asked us to please wait patiently.

it was only at 1:30 that they let us in.

i have a hunch on how the filipinos lost in battle. why the uprisings failed, and why the filipinos always lost to their conquerors.

because they were never on time.
pinoy captain: "we have successfully stolen some rifles and ammunition from the enemy sir."
pinoy general: "good, have your men ready. we attack at sundown."
pinoy captain: "eat hearty men, for tonight we dine in hell."

*30 minutes before sundown*

pinoy general: "i trust you and your men are ready now."
pinoy captain: "where is pedro?"
pinoy soldier: "i think he's going to be late sir"
pinoy soldier to his fellow pinoy soldier: "where is juan?"
*another pinoy soldier murmurs* "goddamnit those guys are always late"

*attack begins*

pinoy general: "goddamnit captain, we are losing our men. where are the reinforcements?!"
pinoy captain: *looks at his watch and shakes his head*

2 comments:

REDKINOKO said...

This has to be your best post yet. It'd be something I'd like to here from a standup comedian doing live. I really lol'ed man.

Conejo said...

=) thanks.